Already my inbox is beginning to fill up with content about Christmas! From sales pitches to merch to movies, it seems that November 1st is the official marker of the “It’s Almost Christmas” season.

I don’t know about you, but I don’t mind at all! I love that Christmas is beginning to seep back into our minds, thoughts, and hearts as we move towards the holiday season.

That being said, the holiday season can also bring with it an amalgam of distractions. From a million emails to check, to extra work projects, to wonderful parties to attend, the holiday season can turn into the busiest season of all in the blink of an eye. We easily get caught up in commitments, projects, and things we really didn’t want to do. And before you know it, it’s January 1st!

But, there is good news. As we turn towards the season of Hallmark movies, Christmas cookies, red sweaters, Santa, and stockings, there is one thing we can do that will keep us focused on what matters most, and help us eliminate pesky distractions.

The Number One Thing to Do to Prepare for the Christmas Season

Right now, it’s the start of November. Before you get too swept up into your holiday calendar, take a moment to grab a pen and paper.

Divide your page into three different columns. On the top of the first column write the word “Yes”. On the top of the middle column right the word “Maybe”, and on the top of the right column write the word “No.”

This holiday season, what is most important to you? Fill your left side of the page with the top things you want to be sure to do this Christmas, things you definitely want to say “YES!” to!

It’s important to take a momnt to pause here and let your heart just be. Take a deep breath. Close your eyes and envision the upcoming holiday season. What do you really want to do? What do you picture yourself doing? What do you see yourself enjoying the most? Where are you, and who’s there with you? What will fill up your cup and cause you to look forward to the Christmas season?

Maybe an image of you laughing around a table with family as you’re hosting a dinner party comes to mind. Or, you’ve taken your children to pick out a Christmas tree. Perhaps a few images will pop up that surprise you, desires in your heart you didn’t even know were there! For instance, maybe you pictured yourself at a cabin getaway for one weekend in December; or, perhaps you saw yourself traveling, attending a Christmas play, or singing in the church choir.

Maybe for you it’s as as simple as “Read my Advent devotional every day” , “Visit grandparents”, “Encourage my sister,” or “Watch my favorite Christmas movies.” Whatever it is, make a list of things you want to say YES to this Christmas with your whole heart. Get creative! Afterwards, circle your top 5 on the page.

Next, move over to the “Maybe” column. These are things you’d ideally like to do this Christmas, but aren’t sure you’ll have time for. These could include traveling, baking that famous dessert you love, and anything else that comes to mind that you would love to do but it isn’t exactly necessary or essential for a joyful holiday season.

Finally, turn to the “No” column. This year, saying no is just as important as saying yes. Every Christmas, we can get easily sucked into doing things we really don’t want to do. For instance, perhaps on Christmas Day you visit multiple families to please everybody, but your entire family is exhausted rather than filled up at the end of the day. Or, maybe you take on too many work projects and neglect taking the proper rest and vacation days you should. Or, you worry way too much about the future and it ends up ruining your holiday spirit. Perhaps you spend too much money on presents instead of sticking to your budget. Whatever it is that you want to say no to this year, boldly put it on the list!

Of course, we know there are some things we just can’t say no to, such as working, feeding the kids, cleaning, and all those other responsibilities we have in life. Regardless, your “No” list can be a place for empowerment, where you stop people-pleasing and instead put your heart first this Advent season.

Now, you have your list of “Yes,” “Maybe,” and “No.” As you head into the holiday season, you have an idea of exactly what you want to prioritize, what to just kindly let go if it doesn’t happen, and how to better set your boundaries.

Now, ready for the Pro Tip? Keep this list open for a few days! Mull over it, pray over it, and poll family and friends if necessary. Continue to add to each column, crossing things off, moving items around, or brainstorming for a few days. You may be surprised at what comes to mind, including creative ideas that you never would have thought of before! Just be sure to let your heart speak.

This is a simple practice and process that will help you discern what you want to get out of the Christmas season this year, and what you don’t. It will help you know when to say yes, when to say maybe, and when to say no.

After all, we face so many decisions over the Christmas season! But the number one decision we face is how we’re going to spend our time, including what we do, how we treat people and love on others, who we see, and what attitude we’ll carry into the holidays. Most importantly, we can forget to just slow down, rest, and be still.

Perhaps this year you’ve experienced a major life transition. From moving apartments to losing someone, from getting married to getting divorced, people face life-changing circumstances every year, some joyous and some difficult.

As you make your list, take into account what you’ve been through this year. Pause and ask yourself, “What does my heart really need?” And listen.

To give you an example, last year I lost someone very close to me. Christmas had been one of our favorite things together. Facing my first Christmas without him felt depressing. I could have pushed through. I could have done the whole “fake it til you make it” thing. Instead, I decided to take ten days off of work and do absolutely nothing.

You read that right. I did nothing! Besides exchanging presents, I simply took the time to rest, recharge, and feel my feelings. As it turns out, I discovered I was completely exhausted. I slept 10-12 hours every single night. I watched the Star Wars trilogy with my husband, stayed up late, slept in, read to my heart’s content, and slept some more. I allowed my brain to just turn off. Yet I also prayed a lot. I didn’t look at the clock, and I didn’t have anywhere to be. My heart just needed to rest and recuperate, to recharge and be still.

By the time I went back to work in the beginning of January, I felt ready. Instead of feeling completely overwhelmed and depleted, I felt like I had relaxed for the first time since I-don’t-know-when. I felt like I had tended to my heart and rested in ways I hadn’t in a lonnngggg time.

Only you can decide how you want to spend your time, energy, and resources this Christmas season. This year, your Yes/Maybe/No List can set set you on a path of meaningful direction this Christmas. It’s there to give you clarity, discretion, and a nudge in the right direction when you’re faced with some decisions. And on those nights when a family member asks, “What do you want to do?” you already have some thoughts too.

And it can be simple. Perhaps you like a perfectly clean home, but then you look down at your list and you see “Spend meaningful time with my children” is at the top of your “Yes” list. Now you know, it’s time to just let the cleaning go and do what’s most important! Your list can be a great reminder of what really matters.

Other items on your “Yes” list might include:

• Go Christmas caroling
• Drive around and look at Christmas lights
• Read a bedtime Christmas story every night
• Run a local 5k
• Send out Christmas cards this year (take photo early)
• Make Christmas special for my pet
• Read a Christmas novel

What are you most excited about adding to your list?! There are sooo many good options, and I’m sure you can come up with many creative ideas that feel just right for you and your family in this season.

You Can Choose to Be a Blessing This Christmas

As it turns out, you can spend your time the way you want to this Christmas! And you can also choose to be a blessing instead of just staying busy. Your “Yes” list can include ways you desire to be a blessing to others in need. Ideas include:

• Spend a day volunteering at your local charity of choice, such as an orphanage, pet shelter, homeless shelter, or senior home
• Send a close friend who’s had a tough year a surprise gift in the mail
• Visit a family member you haven’t seen in a long time
• Drop off gifts at your local drive for kids in need of Christmas presents
• Visit a hospital with your church group. Hand out Christmas cards, pray over patients, and pass out Bibles to those in need. Maybe you can even coordinate with a local chaplain.
• Put a Christmas Shoebox together for Samaritan’s Purse
• Volunteer at your church to sing in the Christmas choir, greet new visitors, or direct parking during your busy Christmas Eve services
• Bring Christmas cookies to work as a fun and tasty surprise
• Brainstorm and plan a surprise day filled with fun Christmas activities for your kids (or parents, or sibling, or grandparents), creating unforgettable Christmas memories!

The season of Christmas is a time for charity and love. When considering your Christmas list, make sure you take into account ways you want to spend your time giving back to those in need.

As it turns out, those may just become your favorite Christmas memories of all.